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Pyramid of Purity

Massively multiplayer online "game" from the creators of GRUEL and Roderick.

Use Love, drugs and technology to ascend the Pyramid, stopping along the way to recruit others to your priesthood, to eventually take your place as a beloved spiritual leader, with the power to fly, turn invisible, and just generally do whatever the fuck you want. Close your eyes and arise in other worlds – other galaxies! Simply smile at your barista and it's free, equals lick. I do see that they have written NOT a nodecode on the sleeve, equals meow…

Nodecode

Ah yes… delicious. I have ascended the Pyramid and am at the peak of my powers. The peak of the world! Worlds! I know this is a game, that I am not "really" here. But still… this coconut cappuccino is off the charts! equals yum. Let me flow into the street and see who wishes to look at me, yes…

WHO WISHES TO BEHOLD THE GOD ABSEENUS!

"Hooray!"

"Yeah!"

9-VOGEN

10-VOGEN

What's that… a nodecode on the sleeve. Encrypted. A wave of my god-like rod:

0.nine-seven-9-three-43 : .buttered_toast;

Buttered toast…

Lick…

$barista-licky-lick GOTO TOAST—

[INTERRUPT] : meow…

What's that… a nodecode—

EQUALS NOT

NO

= there is = there is NOT a $nodecode meow…

9-VOGEN

10-VOGEN

"LICK! LICK! 11-VOGEN! AIEEEEEEEEE!!!"

"HAHAHA!!"

^

The team

"Interesting… interesting… Buggy! But I'm kinda loving it. The game ends… and now it begins. Brilliant! And bringing the Vogen… and is it even a game… So true to the Vogen! So true to the lick… And you're saying we can change the barista's gender on the fly?"

"Gender. Sexual urge. Plenty of shit. Got some pretty cool AI processing crap going on, even during character creation. They call it GEMINUS. This thing from Shniff. Top secret. Early access etc. Alien-inspired or whatever. The Orb. Impressive. But still… kind of an idiot tbh, considering. Guess it's still waking up or whatever."

"Cool, cool… btw: maybe tone down the profanity? It's fine in-game. Part of the brand! The vibe. But I think we need to be more… nice in here, right? More… spiritual, dare I say? And this coming from someone who screamed all sorts of 'fucks, fuuuucks!' during an episode of 'insanity' on the roof of the psychology department at Tetrahedron University back in the day! I've been there, hacker_child. Believe me. And now we're here. And where are we going? This thing's gonna be huge! We're gonna grow the team, take it to the next level. Take it to the 10-Vogen, yeah!"

"Uh-huh. Right."

Wait… wasn't hacker_child a male entity a moment ago… and for all the moments since I've known him… her… since her name was…

1-VOGEN

2-VOGEN

.

"1-Voggen—"

"1-Vogen. O. Gn. As in 'Oh yes, you can bet your lardalicious provost ass we're gonna be rocking the boat with these experiments, assuming the funding is there, we have no doubt the university will profit eventually, not sure how exactly right now, but this thing is powerful, wow!'" said the professors, together. Smiling, for they knew they were joined for all time. Bonded by the molecule.

.

"So Tony, remind me, bugginess aside, the nodecode is there? Or it isn't there?"

"It's there. But… it isn't there, meow. I am piercing the veil and I see that we are pretending to have a meeting. I see that you speak through your eyes and that your name is Abseenus."

"Tony…?"

"Dammit! I mean… Sorry. Been playing too much POP! It's this kinda game thing—"

"This kinda game thing… that we're currently developing? :)"

"Oh yeah… Right! This thing's off the charts! Or it will be in a few… months? Years? Abseenus! There's a lot to do."

"It's okay, Tony! Relax. Maybe spend some time with the Roderick patch, the craaazy, wildly popular puzzle game for mobile devices which, while its own thing, also serves as an abstract testing ground for some of the next-gen narratives you're bringing to POP. And yes, there's a lot to do, but POP's a long way away. We're set for funding for the next decade. Thanks, Shniff! Thanks, Roderick. We'll probably have created another game by the time we release it. Something involving… Love, perhaps. Yes… Love. Capital L! Sorry, Tony! I know it's not strictly 'correct' :)"

"No it's cool… I like it! Let's take that capital L and bring it to that game we're thinking of making. I mean… that we are making. Already made? Will? Fuck! I mean…"

":))) And yes, hacker_child, I know talking about Love makes me a 'fucking pussy' or whatever. But whatever! Also: btw Tony: I've noticed we're not italicising POP, whether in text, or in our speech. Wait…"

^

System requirements

Tony and hacker_child sit in silence (they can't stand each other tbh, and this tension will prove vital to POP's early development; but they will come to know a great Love and give birth to a virtual child) while n-Vogen hits the bathroom, to explode through both his holes, having experienced his first piercing of the veil since the Tetrahedron days, turning him quite grey, moist. He will stare in the mirror after considerable wipings, sprays, and he will nod, say: "Yes, this it. I remember, and will never forget. No… hacker_child was never a dude. I think… But yes! There was that thing with the italics. I am n-Vogen. Thanks for the weirderrific name, brilliant parents! Sigh… But truly… I have always respected your decision to name me after your most important series of experiments, even through the bullying, the mockery. The respect, eventually, first from the bohemian crowd, then my fellow graduate students who joined me on that trip, where we entered – nay, became! – the heart of the purely theoretical 10-Vogen molecule, which escaped even you, whose non-existence exploded your lab… I have never felt more certain about both the entertainment value and spiritual significance of this game. Abseenus will be whatever it is! There is nothing to fear. There is only fun! Interdimensional adventure. There is only— HNNGGHHHH!!!"

The first – and only – requirement (apart from the latest version of geminOS, which runs on pretty much anything) – rather, a recommendation – it will soon be decided, is that new players of POP will agree to do whatever is required to perform a glorious turd prior to entering the world for the first time, as well as taking industrial-strength anti-nausea medication. Vogenomic will not be liable for the destruction of your underwear, the flooding of your keyboard. The introduction of the VR edition will extend this advice to a virtual cleanse. The movement of the headset to the brain via Shniff implant will introduce juices and deep-cleaning techniques. A base POP juice will be required, with boosters available to high-level priests.

Otherwise, use whatever the fuck you want! A phone, supercomputer. A toaster. A nine-roll hot dog grill with warming drawer, for your buns. Lick. Shniff Cloud takes care of the heavy lifting. Yum…

An open mind is advised, but not required. (But do try not to be too offended by tight leather and that priestess/mechanic with the incredible ass who starts Sugar. (Hardly a spoiler! The ass is well known, even at the highest levels of government… ;))

^